She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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