My Higher Power is John Stamos
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
