Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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