I think my fart just growled at me.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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