Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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