My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
