was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
My breasts were aching with rage.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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