Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
