come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
We left an ass print on the piano.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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