ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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