I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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