lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
