She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize