was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
