There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
