how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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