so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
