i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
