I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
