youre lurking in front of me
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
