That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
