You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
