but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
