"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
splinters make it hard to masturbate
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Mom said you looked used
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
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