I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
