Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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