do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
