It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I deserve this hangover.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
