OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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