I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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