please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
