i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
