So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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