Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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