i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
