did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
