So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
