So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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