So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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