And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
