She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
