i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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