Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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