Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I need a burrito and a hug.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
