took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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