i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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