You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
