Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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