We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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