Kareoke will never be a sober sport
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
